Nu är det jul igen
Igår skulle jorden gå under, i övermorgon är det julafton, härnäst då? Snart ligger du där på dödsbädden vithårig och väntar på dina sista andetagen. Det verkar som sådan. Tiden bara rinner iväg. STOPP! Kan vi inte göra så? Bara stoppa tiden och sedan fortsätta leva i en frusen tid utan att behöva tänka framåt? Det funkar inte att bara leva i nuet. Du kan ta en dag i taget, men du tänker fortfarande framåt. Det blir bara så; vad ska jag äta nu? vad ska jag äta sen? jag måste till toaletten. jag är snart där. var ska jag ta vägen sen? köket? vardagsrummet? ut? in?
En liten funderare. Puss.
En liten funderare. Puss.
Musikhjälpen
Oj, inser nu hur slaviskt jag har följt Musikhjälpen denna vecka. Jag kan inte ha missat många timmar. En jävla härlig trio tycker jag att det var; Jason, Gina och Kodjo. Jag som har varit rastlös samt internet- och kanal-lös har Musikhjälpen varit den bästa lösningen. Jag klagar inte. Hade nämligen hittat mitt mobila bredband (som ersättning), så jag har haft datorn på dygnet runt, vaknat och somnat till denna välgörenhet så att säga. Det är ju nästan det bästa som kan hända, att vakna till radio. Känns som en julgrej att lyssna på radio tycker jag. Dock väldigt trist att det är över nu, vad blir min nästa syssla? Fortsätta läsa med en kopp te i handen? Känner mig så himla svensk och åldrad numera. Efter nästan 1 år i Australien, börjar jag hitta JAG:et i mig själv. Den där gamla damen som läser, dricker te och syr in sina byxor, som samtidigt tycker allt mellan himmel och jord är rörande.
Det är mitt nya liv det. Och ni är jätte välkomna att röra om i grytan, jag är superduper öppen för förslag. Ring mig, maila mig, knacka på dörren, vilket som. Jag sitter i min gungstol och inväntar plinget.
Det är mitt nya liv det. Och ni är jätte välkomna att röra om i grytan, jag är superduper öppen för förslag. Ring mig, maila mig, knacka på dörren, vilket som. Jag sitter i min gungstol och inväntar plinget.
Snöstorm, det gillar vi
Jag har äntligen lärt mig att behärska högertrafiken efter snart ett år på vänstertrafiken. Det tog mig hela 5 dagar. Fantastiskt, inte sant? Ännu bättre att snöstormen är här, man kör som en säl försöker gå över is. Det kan ju nästan inte bli bättre. Tråkigheterna har vänt, kan jag väl säga.
Vad nu? Invänta julen och nyåret. Fest och kalas. Ska ta ett glas vin och sova. Ses.
Vad nu? Invänta julen och nyåret. Fest och kalas. Ska ta ett glas vin och sova. Ses.
Flashback
Jag fick en sådan störd flashback nyss när jag var ute och gick. Jag insåg hur trevliga aussies egentligen är. Var du än går, oavsett vem du är, vad du än gör, hur du än ser ut, så hälsar varenda mänsklig varelse på en. Här i Svealand stirrar dem blint på en, ger en en roundkick med blicken, spottar på en med tankarna och skiter i vilket. Hade man fallit av hjärtinfarkt framför ögonen hade dem förmodligen inte ens märkt det, så känns det. Vilken hemsk tanke, va?
Ville bara få det sagt, hehe. Annars sover jag runt 8 varje dag och vaknar till runt 4 på morgonkvisten. Aldrig sovit så konstigt i halva mitt liv. Så nu sitter jag här, med julröda ögon och försöker hålla mig vaken några timmar till för att så gott jag kan vända på dygnet. Livet är hårt ibland, I-landsproblem.
Ville bara få det sagt, hehe. Annars sover jag runt 8 varje dag och vaknar till runt 4 på morgonkvisten. Aldrig sovit så konstigt i halva mitt liv. Så nu sitter jag här, med julröda ögon och försöker hålla mig vaken några timmar till för att så gott jag kan vända på dygnet. Livet är hårt ibland, I-landsproblem.
Jag tror jag går i ide
Tro det eller ej men jag tycker om vintern, speciellt när den är vit och lyses upp av snön. Man får klä sig extra varmt och verka mysig, även om man kanske råkar vara benig. Att man som en koala sover 20 timmar om dagen känns liksom rätt under mörka vintertider. Inga bekymmer och inga klagomål.
Det enda problemet jag har nu är att jag är så rastlös och uttråkad här. Jag gäspar oavbrutet. Saker och ting verkar så annorlunda idag i jämförelse med 10 månader sedan. Jag vet inte om det är åldern, att gubben har kommit fram och det enda jag ska göra är att dricka whisky med en cigarr mellan mungiporna och ha allmänt tråkigt dag in och dag ut. Eller så kanske jag behöver finna mig nya intressen, kanske samla på dammråttor, fåglar, hajar, strumpor, tånaglar, eller vad vet jag, börja spela piano eller flöjt, curling kanske. Som sagt, jag har ingen aning. Det kan ju inte bero på jetlag'en tredje dagen efter hemkomst. Eller? Jag körde trots allt på vänstra sidan av trafiken, så det kan mycket möjligt vara det.
Äsch, snart nytt år, jag tar och går i ide så länge. Ring mig, kanske. ('Call me, maybe')
My inspiration went away with you
If I would be able to walk in your mind til you retire..
Alive
To poo is to live. To live you have to poo.
To feel poop is to feel alive. To feel alive you have to feel poop.
To smell.. is killing. To kill you have to smell.
Wait a moment, I need to pee.
Good morning!
Stupid stories with stupid endings, tingtong
Have you heard of this Zhou Kehua lately? The most wanted coldblooded criminal dude from Chongqing, or WAS till he got killed. All his victims ended up with a bullet in the skull. So what happened was they had to involve like tens of thousands of policemen to search for this cave-living man. And they killed him straight away. And everyone lived happily ever after. Zzz..
Such a waste, letting him die without even having a little feeling of pain. Why shoot him in the head? Hit both the legs instead and catch him, let him taste a bit of torture or anything for Buddha's sake. Makes me pretty frustrated thinking about such stupid things, like why let him escape so easily? It's like playing hide and seek and the hiders are standing right behind the seeker, how fun would that be? The game ends before it has even started. And the policeman that killed him got a prize. Awesome, congratz. Let's get a new game.. Idiots.
Such a waste, letting him die without even having a little feeling of pain. Why shoot him in the head? Hit both the legs instead and catch him, let him taste a bit of torture or anything for Buddha's sake. Makes me pretty frustrated thinking about such stupid things, like why let him escape so easily? It's like playing hide and seek and the hiders are standing right behind the seeker, how fun would that be? The game ends before it has even started. And the policeman that killed him got a prize. Awesome, congratz. Let's get a new game.. Idiots.
I just had sex, and it felt so good
No, I just did shopping and it felt so good! Haven't done shopping for ages, you know that? It's like being kept away from pooing two days when you really are in need! For real, it felt like a liberation. Like I just learn how to fly. Like cuming during the moment of truth. Like farting when your stomach hurts the most. Ye, you know the feeling.
Long time ago I had this beautiful feeling to waste money. Relief is the word I'm looking for, I think. To not do shopping is like lying to myself. And to do shopping is like telling the truth. So ye, it must be it! I hate lies, and hate telling lies. But sometimes a white lie is worth it.
So.. to tell myself I'm not allowed to do shopping, and do it the next day anyway is like orgasm to the max. Ok, I'm drunk of tiredness now. X
Long time ago I had this beautiful feeling to waste money. Relief is the word I'm looking for, I think. To not do shopping is like lying to myself. And to do shopping is like telling the truth. So ye, it must be it! I hate lies, and hate telling lies. But sometimes a white lie is worth it.
So.. to tell myself I'm not allowed to do shopping, and do it the next day anyway is like orgasm to the max. Ok, I'm drunk of tiredness now. X
Life's a climb... but the view is great
So how are we? Everyone is good? No problems, no feelings hurt, no cry me a river? No? Great. Me neither, almost. The bottom part of my heart is broken. It's like you would cut of the bottom part of a glass and still hope what's in it would stay there, but it can't. I'm not sad, or am I? I'm not sure, if I would stand on a scale of feelings the scale would go around, around and around till the battery stops working. It's just that I've been trying so hard for what I knew would be nothing, or.. no it isn't nothing. There's so much there, so much of the happiness, so much of what I haven't got before. But somehow it's gone, or just up there somewhere but I can't touch it. I can't have it. I can think about, but I can't see it or touch it. It's like in the movies, you just know about but you don't know much more about it when the movie ends.
But it's cool. I've been warned, I shouldn't have any problems with this. It's been a climb and the view has been awesome. I can't wish more of what I've got on such a short time, but it is what it is. That's the story of my dreams, something in between the beautiful and the nightmares.
I hate you chch X :D
But it's cool. I've been warned, I shouldn't have any problems with this. It's been a climb and the view has been awesome. I can't wish more of what I've got on such a short time, but it is what it is. That's the story of my dreams, something in between the beautiful and the nightmares.
I hate you chch X :D
Back in Melbourne
Dear toan.blogg.se,
How are you today? How were you yesterday? How have you been last three weeks? I've missed you, did you miss me? Sorry for not been keeping in touch with you or touching your bum, or cuddle you through every night past weeks. But I've been busy; I've been loving, loving my country, loving the heat, loving the food, loving the life and loving a girl etc. But now I'm back to embrace you Blog.
So.. let me know, what do you wanna talk about? Anything? Well, you can say I've been expanding my experiencestorage a bit during this three-weeks-trip. I'll probably wait a while with telling you what, or maybe you wont get to know at all. I'll think about it. It's been fun though, I been through blood, sweat and tears, plus it was a hell of a happy ending of the trip.
I gotta go Dear, I'll see you soon? X chch
How are you today? How were you yesterday? How have you been last three weeks? I've missed you, did you miss me? Sorry for not been keeping in touch with you or touching your bum, or cuddle you through every night past weeks. But I've been busy; I've been loving, loving my country, loving the heat, loving the food, loving the life and loving a girl etc. But now I'm back to embrace you Blog.
So.. let me know, what do you wanna talk about? Anything? Well, you can say I've been expanding my experiencestorage a bit during this three-weeks-trip. I'll probably wait a while with telling you what, or maybe you wont get to know at all. I'll think about it. It's been fun though, I been through blood, sweat and tears, plus it was a hell of a happy ending of the trip.
I gotta go Dear, I'll see you soon? X chch
My confession part II
Ages ago since I felt this happiness. It's not just that, I feel lucky. I do. Everyone would feel the same to meet that kind of person like you. You know, I had a major wall built to keep me away from all this fear. I had a hard time falling for someone, but you came and smashed it like it was made of pillows. You came through and hit the jackpot without even trying.
I was afraid getting into this depression, sadness and all this unhappy things loves can make you go through. But somehow, you have only brought the good side out of me, the joy, the butterflies, the motivation, how to see the sweets in people and to love with no fear.
Me too, is hoping for a never ending friendship, but it's complicated. Though I will always be available for a talk, or two, as friends and you know where to find me. You know what? I can't even feel sad you know, because as soon as I think of you I smile. There's only beautiful stories in there and will last like a tattoo in my brain. Thank you for being a part of my story.
X ily 2 chomchom
And in time this too shall pass
Sometimes life sucks, sometimes life's wonderful. It's like the roller coaster, it goes up and down, and mostly ends with the same story. But life has to go on, no matter if it hurts, if it's great or perfect. You can't expect anything to last forever. That's just how it is, people always leave. No matter what happens, have no regrets, if it's bad take it as a lesson. You'll learn lots during life, and lately I'm very thankful for what I've experienced and what I've learnt. Yet I have no regrets, and I have you to be grateful to. This will be a memory that I always can bring up, and I'm glad I can. Take care for a lifetime, you might not hear it again.
Love (T)arre
Must have been the worse ever
X chomchom
Kuala Lumpur Airport, Malaysia
Yoo, wazap?
We're in Kuala Lumpur atm waiting for the next flight to Vietnam. Sitting here at Starbucks Coffee with an awesome caffée latte and Wi-Fi connection! Going to sit here for a while I guess, since our flight is not going within 6 hours. Still a bit tired, but we're doing fine.
Well, out of words, see you when I see you! chomchom
We're in Kuala Lumpur atm waiting for the next flight to Vietnam. Sitting here at Starbucks Coffee with an awesome caffée latte and Wi-Fi connection! Going to sit here for a while I guess, since our flight is not going within 6 hours. Still a bit tired, but we're doing fine.
Well, out of words, see you when I see you! chomchom
People always leave
So, now I'm all set! Leaving tmr, can't wait til I step on the plane. Wonder if I will get some sleep tonight. There's so much I want to do atm, but I can't, or I'm not allowed, or it's more like I shouldn't. Just wait and see.
However, I'm catching the bus at Dandy around 6:40 pm towards the airport of Melbourne. Probably I will wake up early tmr all excited and spend my millions of minutes waiting to get my ride there. I hate waiting!
Now, movie "chomchom"! See you when I see you. Love.
I need healing
And that's why I'm going to do in Vietnam. Yepp, I'm going, believe it or not! My priority is going to be resting and enjoying my rockstar life (big time), at least it will feel like that. :D! I'm going to get my massages I've been craving for and eat all and everything that comes in my way. Purr :*
What else? I'm going to extend my ticket and get married in August and bring my kids home to Sweden next year. Mohaha, I wish! It might be the wrong time in my life to get into such proccess, but it's a fun thought. Or? Hehe. Ye, rewind the tape a little.
However, monday (9/7) will be the last of Melbourne, but just for a while, a few weeks. I'll be back soon enough for you to not miss me. Sucks though that you'll probably have to miss me forever or forget me...
Zzz, I just forgot my point of this post, so I'm going to bed to warm it up and have some awesome sleep with awesome dreams. So long dudes.
"chomchom".
What else? I'm going to extend my ticket and get married in August and bring my kids home to Sweden next year. Mohaha, I wish! It might be the wrong time in my life to get into such proccess, but it's a fun thought. Or? Hehe. Ye, rewind the tape a little.
However, monday (9/7) will be the last of Melbourne, but just for a while, a few weeks. I'll be back soon enough for you to not miss me. Sucks though that you'll probably have to miss me forever or forget me...
Zzz, I just forgot my point of this post, so I'm going to bed to warm it up and have some awesome sleep with awesome dreams. So long dudes.
"chomchom".
The next day will be my day off
I had a hell of a morning today!! Was snoozing like a half an hour, til around 7.30 am, cuz my room is colder than a fridge. About a quarter to be picked up. But I made it, I kinda ate breakfast while brushing my teeth, which saved me a few minutes. Hehe! The worse was when the car got flat tire and we had to wait like an hour on the highway to work. Gaah, such a waste of time and mornings in Melbourne during winter is freezingly!! But somehow I managed to survive. I'm such a rockstar :D.
Can't wait to see what else I'm going to experience so far from home the next 7 coming months. Oh ye, did I tell you I had my first earthquake experience here aswell? No, I didn't. And I'm not gonna tell either ;D.
However, I'm having a day off tmrz (wed)! How frkn great isn't that? It's like heaven to touch, or having a major dumping when you're very in need! Like when you get these goosebumps and you almost can't hold it anymore. The feeling of when you just let it all out.
Well, let me know if you wanna meet, otherwise I'll see you when I see you. :*
This is for you
I've been through a few, and thousands of thousands other things are waiting to be done. I can't wait til' then! Anyway, I've been a farmer 6 days a week, 9+ hours a day, and a rockstar on my sparetime. I think I'm pretty lucky I found this farm. I've met such friendly people and have had lots of laughs and love!
I'll tell you more another time. Just wanted to tell you that I'm alive and alright! Miss you
